Hi Dav, I enjoyed reading this argument. Your second paragraph has some good points to it. It is by far the most relevant paragraph too. I see you did attempt some emotive language and have some good linking phrases but struggled to have clearly identify the main ideas in a topic sentence. You also did not cite your source for the study. Is it important to clearly state your opinion in the introduction?
Hi Dav, I enjoyed reading this argument. Your second paragraph has some good points to it. It is by far the most relevant paragraph too. I see you did attempt some emotive language and have some good linking phrases but struggled to have clearly identify the main ideas in a topic sentence. You also did not cite your source for the study. Is it important to clearly state your opinion in the introduction?
ReplyDeleteGood information like the main ideas I like the last paragraph
ReplyDeleteThank you taylah
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